The following subject I am going to talk about is a serious one that i wish will never happen to me again. Whoever is reading this, may you know and make sure this doesn't happen to anyone you love, please put a halt to this. The maniacs who did this sick act to me, may they rott in hell!!

The subject is Rape.

The first time I was raped was 1998, by my female lover at the time. This happened at her apartment, we had just got back from the movies, it was valentine's day/night and i was spending the night there, at her apartment. She and I were in her bedroom, she gave me a massage. She started slowly putting her fingers in me. She increasingly got more and more aggressive with each thrust. I told her to stop, but my plead fell on her deaf ears. she didn't stop She just continued. until i bled. she had scratched, tore me inside. she loved watching me in escrutiating pain, she got off on it, she felt powerful doing it, i could tell by the expression on her face. no matter how much i pleaded for her to stop, she kept on. humiliating me, telling me 'you can take it, you'll be no virgin no more.' i told her i already lost my virginity. but she didn't listen. Her meaning of losing virginity was on a physical level, not any other. Her actions were animalistic. The morning after, I was in so much pain, i couldn't even go to the bathroom. I felt something run down my leg, it was blood. I was mortified. i cleaned up myself and got home. I felt sick, I felt it was my fault. I felt disgusted. I didn't tell anyone. I didn't go to a doctor, I was terified. Though this happened to me, it didn't change the way i felt about women, I was only disgusted with her, my female lover, I broke it off with her imediately. I felt she was a pig for what she'd done to me.

The 2nd time I was raped, was in 2007. I came down to Ft. Lauderdale to visit a few friends. I stayed with a guy I had known when I was living in Ft. Lauderdale, I was staying at his house for a few days. We were in his bedroom, he was up against me doing his thing, getting off, I tried to get away from him but this guy was 6'5 strong and let up when he was done. I fell asleep. when i awoke, I felt something inside me, when I came too, I realized it was him, his fist up in me while i was asleep. I was livid, i packed my stuff and went home. I wasn't pregnant, good thing, 'cause if i had been I would've had an abortion. I felt sick, disgusted, mortified. I severed all ties with him imediately.

To me, I feel Rape can happen to anyone by anyone, regardless of gender. the saying all guys are rapist, isn't true, because even a woman can be a rapist as well. it happened to me, it could've been fatal, but it wasn't, maybe someone up there, god perhaps was watchng out over me. Anyone could be a rapist, man or woman.

After i was raped twice, by different people, once by my female lover and again my a guy I shortly stayed with. I had feelings of hate, disgust, sadness, I felt sick both physically and emotionally. Being raped didn't change the way i feel about men or women, it did however change the way i feel about my rapists. I hate them. Just because one is raped, doesn't mean they have to be angry at the whole world, because the whole world didn't rape them. Their rapists did. I don't hate the world. I hate my rapists.Rape is a crime and those who do it should be locked up! I agree with Don, when he said in the interview on National Geographic, in the is it real, vampires segment, about people who hunt others and are preditory, should be locked up. I agree with him 100%

~Laura